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There’s a recall for all Stellantis EVs on the PSA platform, including your DS. Hit up your dealer to get it checked out. It’s about the BMS and aircon, which could mess up the car if they fail. While you’re there, ask them to check the AC charging too, it’s still under warranty for the battery...

I'm fairly certain there's no sound. I can't check at the moment, but this should help: https://www.manua.ls/citroen/ds7-crossback-2022/manual?p=202

So, after just a few weeks with my DS, I had to refill the screenwash for the first time, and honestly, I’m baffled. For a car packed with tech and with options that can easily push the price tag to luxury levels, how is there no low-level warning for screenwash? Seriously, DS, this feels like...

It sounds like a feature that doesn't actually do anything. It's common for salespeople to not know about every little detail. It could be a software error or a feature that was never fully finished. Since it only seems to work in Sport mode and you can't hear any difference it probably isn't...